jaclcfrost:

"why do you like floral prints so much" because i’m not a person. secretly i’m just a mass of bees. trying to blend in with humans. unable to let go of my love of flowers

(via hotboyproblems)

gotitforcheap:

cute girl on the street: hey do you have the time?

me: sure do! 8:15

cute girl on the street: thanks 

me: so what are we?

(via hotboyproblems)

The Amercian school system.

(via sbree23)

Today I went to Subway.

There were these 12 year old boys hanging around. As I got my food and left they were all checking me out like little prepubescent lemurs and one of them said “Can I get your number?” And I turned around and said “Why, you need a babysitter?”

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(Source: beautilation, via hotboyproblems)

fortheloveofotps:

sqvad:

pansoph:

pansoph:

i went to a party and put 3 whole loaves of sliced bread all around the house i put bread under the kid’s pillow and in all 3 of his bathrooms, in his rugby shorts and the breast pocket of his school shirt, on his roof and his neighbor’s roof, in his couch and on his tv i’m laughing so hard he’s going to wake up hungover tomorrow and be like why the fuck is there bread everywhere 

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i’m pissing myself

jesus christ

jesus crust

(via hotboyproblems)

wigglytuffer:

dropping hints to bae that ur ready

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(via hotboyproblems)

when you over-hear a joke in someone else’s conversation and accidentally laugh out loud

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(Source: whimmy-bam, via hotboyproblems)

embarrassmental:

narcotic:

what if people named their kids when they turn 18 so the kid has a name that fits its personality

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(via hotboyproblems)

phosphorescentt:

can we please destroy this idea that a person has to talk to you every minute of every day to like you

texting all day is not natural

force communication all hours of the day is not natural

(via justtryingtomakeyousmile)

snazziest:

I’m reading your palm and it says it belongs on my butt

(via hotboyproblems)